Toxic Positivity

Welcome to the month of thankfulness! 🦃✨

All month long, we’re sharing stories that celebrate gratitude at work — the coworkers who lift us up, the leaders who make a difference, and the teams that truly get it.

But what happens when positivity goes too far? When “good vibes only” becomes a rule instead of a mindset? This week’s story dives into the dark side of forced happiness — and what it’s like to work where grief isn’t allowed.

Toxic Positivity

I know a lot of people say that being too positive is a good thing… until they experience it themselves. I (21M) landed a contracting job with a consultant who called herself a “lifestyle guru.” Her business focused on advertising services and teaching online courses about how to build a successful brand.

When I first interviewed to be her executive assistant, I didn’t get the job. After receiving the rejection email, I replied to thank them and said I was still interested if anything changed. Two weeks later, I got another email — turns out their first choice quit after one week. They asked if I was still available. I said yes and started shortly after.

There were five of us total. My main trainer was Valerie, the customer support rep. She was warm, friendly, and genuinely loved her job. Every week we had two team meetings where everyone had to share what they were grateful for. It didn’t matter how your day was going — you had to find something profound to say. A simple “I had a relaxing weekend” wouldn’t cut it; it needed to sound spiritual, like you’d just discovered your purpose in life. We were also heavily encouraged to take cold showers to “awaken our soul” and start every morning with water & lemon.

Two weeks into my new job, Valerie was gone. I found out during a team meeting when I noticed she wasn’t there. The consultant laughed as she explained that Valerie wasn’t “happy enough” to work there. Later, I learned that Valerie’s best friend had passed away two months before I started, and her aunt (who was like a mother to her) passed shortly after. She was still grieving, and from what I could tell, it didn’t affect her work. Instead of showing compassion, they fired her over it.

That’s when I realized what really happened: they’d hired me to replace her. She trained me, and once I was ready, they let her go. My job shifted overnight from EA work to handling customer emails under the consultant’s name. I had to write responses to the customer as if I was the consultant. On top of that, I managed her social media accounts, which meant reading — and always responding to per policy — some of the most disgusting DMs you can imagine. I lost count of the creepy messages and marriage proposals from men who thought they were talking to her.

I was eventually let go just under a year later, and honestly? I’ve never been so relieved. Between the toxic positivity, the emotional manipulation, the angry clients, and the inappropriate messages, I swear I will never work for another “consultant” again.